I just got back inside the cabin at 12am after hanging out in the cold woods with my neighbor Curt. He was sitting in his truck in a wide open meadow listening to music, smoking a joint and drinking coffee. I pulled up on my four wheeler under the stars and spiraling night sky. We talked shit for a while and then took off in his pickup for a joy ride along the river and through the fields of his farm. So I just got back and built a fire. It’s beginning to get cold at night here. Every night it gets down into the 30’s. There is a forecast for snow this weekend. Tomorrow I start working in the kitchen at the Bluestone Dining Room at Pipestem. This past weekend we shut down Mountain Creek for the season. I’ve had the past two days off of work and I haven’t done a damn thing. Not a single productive thing I shit you not. I took multiple naps, ate food, built fires, surfed the internet, and watched television. I haven’t left the farm in two days. Visiting with Curt moments ago in the field was the first time I’ve seen another person in two days.
I’m feeling kinda weird tonight but less weird than I have for the past two days. A serious case of lethargy came upon me and I couldn’t get motivated to do ANYTHING. I keep telling myself that it’s alright, it’s okay. I needed a little break but still I’m getting down on myself for being so lazy and unproductive. It really doesn’t matter though cause come tomorrow morning I will have plenty to do once again.
I’m in the headspace right now where I’m pretty much giving up on women. Fuck it. Fuck you. I’ll remain alone. Good night bitches.
